Prince Charming Isn’t Coming

I can still remember dancing round and round as a child, singing along:

Some day my Prince will come…

Cinderella, I think? I’ve seen all the Disney movies so many times they all start to blur together. When I was a child, the Princess craze hadn’t taken off the same way it has today. That didn’t mean we all weren’t dreaming of being princesses!

But at some point, every little girl has to grow up. As M.P. Dunleavey used to write years ago at Prince Charming isn’t coming. It’s highly unlikely you’ll win the lottery. Or even inherit millions of dollars. There’s a point when you have to face the facts: It’s your job to make your own dreams come true.

That’s not to say you won’t meet the man of your dreams, and live happily ever after. But no one is going to swoop in and save you from the realities of adult life. And that’s the downfall for many people; They believe that someone or something will magically come along and make their life perfect.

I’ll admit that from time to time, I daydream about winning the lottery. But then I go back to my daily life of saving and working hard. If I want something in life, I have to be willing to make it happen. I’ve met a wonderful man, who supports me in my goals, and we’ve started creating shared goals. That being said, one of the things that he likes about me is that I don’t expect him to take care of me. I look at his as my partner, not as my “Sugar Daddy”.

Everyone struggles in life. Often times, making good choices can be more of a struggle than making bad ones. But once you’ve made enough bad decisions, setting things to right again can seem overwhelming. I’ve watched over and over as my younger sister has struggled to get her life back on track. Eventually she makes it back, working a job, raising her two boys, rebuilding her life. But she clings to the fantasy that some day Prince Charming is going to save her. Over and over she grasps on to the first guy who comes along, and lets go of everything she’s worked so hard to rebuild.

I can’t make her choices for her. And I can’t force her to learn from her mistakes. I love her dearly. But I admit that I don’t respect or approve of the choices she makes.

We all live according to our own values, whether we realize it or not. We can’t force others to live the way we want them to. It’s human nature to want the best for the people you love. But at some point you have to realize that people have to be free to live their own lives. And while I’m not against helping someone in need, I think there comes a point where you’re no longer helping them to make better choices, only enabling them to keep making the wrong choices. If you truly want something in life, you’re willing to work for it.

I’ll never have a Prince Charming, but I may have met my Mr. Charming. We’ll never have a Castle, but with hard work and commitment we might someday have a Home. And we’ll still be able to live Happily Ever After.

– Ms. W

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